To start us off, I happened to come across this article (from the heterosexual side):
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http://www.seductioninsider.com/articles/ten_best_books_on_sex_and_seduction.html
So what are our picks for the 10 best books on sex and seduction in the last 10 years? In no particular order, they are:
Graham Masterton, How to Drive Your Woman Wild in Bed -- We really enjoyed this book; it's nice to see a quality sexual publication that's actually written for the men for once. Of course we can all learn something new, and a man is almost sure to do just that by reading Masterton's work.
An excellent guide for all men, from the most inexperienced virgin to "expert" lovers. It gives a great amount of detail as to how to please most women. This covers not only the physical aspect of sexuality, but the way in which the sexual act is approached -- it will bring a new spark to your bedroom by giving at least some clue as to what the woman is feeling, emotionally as well as physically.
Technique is considered much less important than mutual communication, respect and intimacy. A detailed guide to oral sex is included, as well as various methods used to make one's partner feel comfortable enough to open up a bit more. We highly recommend this book, especially if the topic of sexuality has always been a difficult one for you to ask about or discuss.
Lou Paget, How to Give Her Absolute Pleasure -- "Women are like golf courses," writes sex educator Lou Paget. "Even though you may have played a course a hundred times, chances are your approach shot rarely lands in the same place on the green." If you want a damn fine book written by a female writer (to give you some of the best ideas on how to please a woman), you may want to check out this work. How to Give Her Absolute Pleasure was written for men who want to please women. Much of the book focuses on foreplay (Paget comments that we need to rename it) designed to "excite both her mind and her body."
Paget offers a variety of strategies for romancing and relaxing a woman and making her feel comfortable; if you don't, she claims, "nothing you can do can rev her engine." Then she describes ways of "kissing her, touching her, and teasing her." Paget includes "a topographical guide" of a woman's body, starting with the sensual areas of the head and face and moving down. She describes ways to massage, caress, lick, kiss, and otherwise excite all these regions. She also discusses lubricants ("slippery, slidy, marvelous stuff"), condoms, manual stimulation, "the art of tongue," sex toys, and a variety of positions (clearly illustrated) for everything you might do. Paget continually stresses that some women love having a particular body part touched in a certain way, while others can't stand it. Whether you're a novice or consider yourself sexually sophisticated, we figure there’s plenty you can learn from Ms. Paget.
Apparently we aren't the only ones who like this work. Take a look at what Library Journal had to say:
"Paget's How To Be a Great Lover (LJ 1/99) was a unique and useful sex manual for women about men." Now this "sexpert" is back to tell men how to arouse women -- stressing the best and most versatile uses of hands and mouth. An excellent book, created out of experience from Lou Paget's seminars and workshops. The techniques are well explained and illustrated, the tone of writing is on a personal basis making the information easy to accept and apply. Of at least equal importance to the great variety and explanation of "how to" techniques, is the early discussion of setting the mood, consideration of caring approach, and simple "partner considerations" that do so much to pave the way to opening the mind for rewarding and exciting new fulfillment in sexual relationships.
Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus -- All right, we know: 'What the hell kind of "touchy-feely" thing is this?'
We admit, we thought that about this book too -- until we took an honest look at what the author of this very popular work had to say. True, it is too simplistic in parts, but the basic underlying thesis is sound: that men and women have lived fundamentally different lifestyles for almost as long as there has been civilization, so we inevitably still carry these near-ingrained conceptions of our deepest selves. Both sexes want essentially the same things -- love, sex, a feeling of belonging -- but we naturally come at these things in different ways. Neither side is right or wrong, just different. Understanding that, and in which ways this difference manifests itself in sex, dating, and love, can go a long way to helping us cut thru the apparent crap, and figure out what’s really going on when we just can't understand each other.
If you take the book in the overall spirit in which it is intended, it truly can help you to understand the more puzzling -- and sometimes even downright strange -- aspects of the female mind.
"[How do I create such believable female characters for my novels?] Well first, I think of a man; and then I take away reason and accountability." -- Jack Nicholson, from the film As Good as it Gets.
Ron Louis & David Copeland, How to Succeed With Women -- Tell you what, just read parts of this Amazon.com review of the book by Niko from Greenville, NC:
"I have never read a book with this many pages in over a week, but once I started to read this book I could not stop. SO many of the things that it said made incredible sense to me. It was like my eyes were finally opened and it took a book to help me see the light. [...] This book helped me to realize where I have been making the mistakes that have plagued me for years. It gives you tips about that first coffee date and that women love self confidence. Because I read this book I did the unthinkable, for me anyway. I hit on a girl in a store, and would have gotten her phone number if she did not have a boyfriend already... for me it was a success, since I would never have done that in the first place if it was not for reading this book. If you have ever been the friend who does not get the girl, and you still don’t know why, read this book!! BUY a used copy and take a chance!"
Baber, Asa, Naked at Gender Gap: A men's view of the war between the sexes -- Asa Baber provides actual proof that Playboy magazine really DOES have interesting articles. Brash and unflinching, for more than a decade Barber has been pouring out his heart and mind on the inequities in the ground rules of the battle of the sexes. His most recent book is a collection of his columns from the magazine, which explores the minefield of gender issues in his usual witty, vulgar, and brave masculine voice. In this book, he discusses all the issues that try men's souls with a toughness and a sensitivity that are sure to provoke spirited argument. Virtually no part of his personal history - he suffered the loss of custody of his two sons who later returned to him on their own - his psyche, or his anatomy goes unexposed. This book is one of the most important books to engage in the new dialogue about the lives of men in contemporary America.
R. Don Steele, Body Language Secrets: A Guide During Courtship and Dating -- Sexual signals help you find, meet, talk with and date Ms. Right using secrets of nonverbal communication. Forty photographs clearly show what to watch out for. The essence of courtship and dating conversations are to communicate, with and without words, a few basic things: "This is who I am. I hope you like me. Show and tell me about yourself so I can discover if I like you."
Men, learn how you can tell from across the room if she's interested in you just by her posture and gestures. During conversation, find out if she's leading you on or if she's sincerely interested in you. A typically honest chapter is entitled Courtship Tactics For Men.
Tom French, Orange County Register, February 3, 1997-- "Steele has written the benchmark book of courtship body language. There's nothing that even comes close. Money well spent."
From the Publisher -- "1032 copies were sold before publication, sight unseen, to buyers of Steele's other books. Absolutely guaranteed money back, no questions asked."
Matthew Fitzgerald, Sex-Ploytation: How Women Use Their Bodies to Extort Money from Men -- This book about male-female relationships deals with contemporary female duplicity in our modern society. The text takes up where The Manipulated Man by Esther Vilar left off 27 years ago. An important book if you've been burned before.
Yeah, we know: "Why talk about such things? Not every woman is like that!," we can almost hear the neo-feminists screaming. Which, of course, is certainly true enough; but it’s also true that most men don’' hit their women, either -- yet you don't see women flinching from studies about that, or insisting that such an important subject doesn't deserve to be examined . . . nor should you. So do yourself a favor, and find out just How Women Use Their Bodies To Extort Money From Men (as if you didn't already know)!
From the Publisher -- "The central thesis of the book . . . has hit the target dead on. It's all true, every guy knows it -- but you're not supposed to say this stuff!"
Penthouse 'Letters' Series -- "I always thought the letters I read in your magazine were made up, until last weekend when I met my best friend’s hot mother and sister . . ."
Yes, we've read them like everyone else -- and, like everyone else, we've long ago realized that most of what we read in those letters is as much inspiration as reality. All the same, who hasn't gotten more than a few wicked ideas for the bedroom by reading these things? Who hasn't actually tried at least something they've read in these notes, many of which are surprisingly entertaining and well-written?
Perhaps they really are just fantasies most of the time; only the original writers know for sure. But at least they're usually well-written, always accessible fantasies that you can imagine actually trying with a daring lady. That itself says a lot about their value.
Over the past few years the Penthouse company has turned the best missives thruout the years into a series of books, which you can peruse at most bookstores. Find the one that best fits your personal tastes, get hold of that special girl and try to score a few adventures of your own.
Farrell, Warren, The Myth of Male Power -- The author has embarked upon an extraordinary mission that concerns us all -- to bring the sexes back together. Backed by a stunning array of facts, this book shatters the singular assumption that often keeps men and women apart: the fatal belief that men have all the power. This myth, says the author, makes women feel constantly oppressed and angry and men feel constantly unloved and unappreciated. This simple book, filled with staggering facts gathered from numerous reliable sources, will empower both sexes to ask the questions we need to begin a genuine dialogue, so there can finally be an honest exchange -- and, eventually, mutual understanding and love.
These are not the ramblings of a anger-ridden misogynist -- for about five years Farrell worked as one of the heads for the National Organization for Women (N.O.W.). He’s a person who has dedicated his professional life to mutual understanding and real compassion between the sexes. That makes this book a terrific read for any male who considers himself a ‘good guy’. Farrell believes (and proves in his well-researched writing) that men are only considered "real men" when society makes them expendable, disposable statistics, while men who choose to preserve themselves or assert their individuality are traditionally seen as weak and undesirable. This is implied over and over again in the media, fiction, and film, whether the public realizes it or not.
Also, Farrell reveals in a special chapter how women are protected to the hilt by harassment laws, yet many women's ideas of the perfect man stay quietly centered around dreams of masochism, rape fantasy, and abuse of male power. This is controversial stuff, no doubt . . . yet it will engage the reader with many never-considered points of view, most strongly of which is the re-occurring theme that today's man, in any relationship, is required to take all the risks, all the responsibility, and all the rejection. Quite a book.
Nancy Friday Books -- Let's say it from the outset: these books are definitely written by a woman, for women. But Friday's books deal almost exclusively with women's real view and understanding of sex; her work, 'Women on Top' deals with nothing but the deepest sexual fantasies of modern women, talking amongst themselves as you may never have heard them speak before.
So for a man who knows what he's doing, Friday's books are a potential gold mine. There's none of the usual filtering of thoughts here, no sexual politics being played; just women being brutally honest about what they really want, and what really makes them hot, with nothing held back precisely because they feel sure men aren't listening.
We're sure there is some fine book you may have read, something that certainly deserves to be noticed that perhaps wasn't noticed here; but damn guys, we have lives -- we can't read every book coming down the pike
. But we know we've probably made your private libraries -- not to mention your private lives -- a bit larger and more interesting thru this little list. You can thank us later . . .===============================================================
Nice gift ideas... someone is going to get lucky?
I'll be back to add a couple more of my personal favorites. And your favorite book is?
If one of the aforementioned books is a favorite of yours already, perhaps you'd like to post a few comments on it.
Reach
